What would you do?
I have been married for 19 years. The first 12 years of the marriage I was on the road a lot. I never had trust or respect issues with my wife ( never had reason to or snooped ) plus I never gave her any reasons to not trust or respect me. My wife was comfortable staying home with our daughter through grade school. While that was happening she watched other kids for some extra spending money. I noticed her becoming more irritable around kids and I suggested getting a job so she could be around adults. Well she did, sort of. She works at an electronics retailer and the majority of the workers are 1/2 her age. She works crazy hours. There have been times where I thought she wasn’t being very upfront with me on some issues. Like a huge increase of texting, always on the PC IM’ing etc. This isn’t an issue but when she is looking over her shoulder to see where I’m at it raises suspicion. When I called her out on it I got " you’re being paranoid" etc. I did confront her a couple of years ago on some other issues where at first she said she didn’t do them but my continual pursuit for the truth wore her down and she admitted doing something she said she never would do. The facts here don’t matter to me as much as her having and demonstrated the nerve to lie to my face. We went through a tough period to get back on track and I thought we did.

Fast forward to today… Well I know she likes the attention from the younger crowd , especially guys. Our sex life is good. But there were a few times where her stories on things didn’t add up. So I know it was wrong, but I snooped on her and found some things that really bother me. I’m not sure if I should confront her or just continue to snoop. What would you do if your wife flirts online to guys? Has sent nude photos to two co-workers ( but in another snooped message claims she regrets doing that )? Was at a party where a co-worker came onto her and may have kissed and touched her inappropriately and she never mentioned any of this to me. Has acknowledged in another message ( another snooped message that I found) co-masturbating with the same co-worker (same co-worker as the one she sent the nude pics to )? As you can see these things really bother me. I’m caught between confronting her with evidence thus making me a snooper or just letting this play out. I really don’t think she has crossed the physical fidelity line but her behavior is less than trustful and she definitely isn’t showing me respect. I think she lacks confidence around the younger girls and goes out of her way to get some attention. She may be a closet exhibitionist but I doubt that as she is very strict with our daughter. To her credit, other than these questionable acts she has been an ideal wife. But since she has lied in the past and now these issues have surfaced I can’t help but wonder what she has done and hasn’t been open with me about.

Ladies… Should I turn my cheek on this or should I confront her? Doing this will also blow my chances of finding out anything new and also be called a snooper. I’m torn between just fighting through this or filing for divorce. I have always provided financially, emotionally and physically. I make 5 times more than her and know she has a lot more to lose than me. And before the wise cracks start I’m very good looking and well endowed. I have had many opportunities to stray but that isn’t in my DNA. Thanks for taking the time to read all of this.
Thanks for the earlier replies as Yahoo doesn’t allow editing, only add on comments.
To address some of the comments, I’m going to a lawyer tommorrow. I’m not looking to make up as this behavior has been over the top. Thanks for the replies.

So I’m just going to paste in the intro and 1st chapter…please be honest, but be SPECIFIC in your comment…thanks so much

Intro…basically so you don’t start reading and scratch your head and go “huh?”

The Philosophy:
In philosophical terms, we all bump into each other and are each other’s passers by. We sometimes believe there is fate, however, the truth might be our life has a million possibilities and there is no destined route.
Our parents bumped into each other at a unique time and unique place, so there are us… Every day, we pass by people, opportunities, familiar streets and unfamiliar information. We pass by them all, yet we sometimes choose to pay no attention. The question is, what if we stop, what if we speak with a passer by on the street? Will things change? Will our entire life change? Sometimes it will, this is for sure.~Some Random Person Online (http://flickr.com/photos/11983192@N00/767368058)

Have you ever thought about that? About how when you meet someone for the first time it could actually be the 200th time that you have crossed paths. That there’s such a slim chance that you will find your soul mate, and how there are a million options that you make per day (for instance, if you weren’t reading this book, then what would you be doing right now?…). That every face you see in a crowd has their own story, their own life, their own problems, their own dreams, their own family and friends. And how everybody’s life is intertwined, by the small things we do every day. I know that it sounds corny but what you do really can effect some random person halfway across the world. Also, about how many different people have touched the money that you hold, about how many people have stood where you stand? About how many people had to work to provide the shirt that you are wearing right now (if you are wearing one ;)…). Just think…

The Story:
So basically there’s a street. It doesn’t matter where and it doesn’t matter when. But if you really care that much and you can’t read without knowing, then we’ll say that the street is called Chestnut Oak Drive. It’s in whatever state you want it to be in. It takes place somewhere in the early 21st century. But the concept can apply to any street. Whether there are two hundred people walking by or ten, it doesn’t matter. Each face has its own story. Its own pain, hardships, opinions, goals, achievements, secrets, and more. It’s just whether or not we choose to care that matters. Now obviously I’m not asking you to go up to every person you walk by and ask them what their life story is. You’d probably get hit in the face with a purse. What I’m asking is that next time you walk down the street, or stare out the window on a highway, just think for a second about all the stories that are rushing by your eyes.
Overwhelming?
Yes.
But if you don’t, then what will you miss out on?

Footsteps:
There’s no character in this book that’s more important than another. Believe me, if I could then they’d all be at the exact same place in the book and no one would come first or last. But alas, that is physically impossible, and also incredibly confusing. So instead I’m titling each of these stories “Footsteps.” PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE feel free to read them out of order. In fact, you get an imaginary gold star if you do so. Just open the book to a random page and read about these extraordinary people. Extra-ordinary. They are regular people, yet every regular person is actually amazing. So start to walk down the road. Whether it’s Chestnut Oak Drive, or some other street, just walk and see where it takes you.

Daron
Alone in the life
He meets many other souls
Who come to be
Unfit for the lonely soul
The lonely soul wanders

As the days pass by
The lonely soul became
More lonely, with no other
souls as his companion
The lonely soul wanders

Daron is a twenty five year-old businessman. Day and night he works…and works…and works…but it’s all a distraction. He has no friends, not even a pet. He lives by himself.
He is a lonely man. Sometimes he wishes that he could just give it all up. That he could go over to his best friend’s house and watch football and just sit there. But he doesn’t actually think that he could. Because he doesn’t understand sports. He was always picked last for sports at school and he would bet a million dollars that if for some reason he was playing sports now, he’d still be picked last.
So maybe not a guy friend to watch football with. But what about a girlfriend? Someone to tell all of his problems to. Someone who will just listen. Who loves him uncontrollably and can’t imagine life without him. But he doesn’t think that he will ever be kissed softly by one of the female sex. He’s had that suspicion ever since fourth grade when Bethany Hamilton told him that no girls would ever like him and that he was icky and proceeded to steal his sandwich. Yet there had to be someone…someone out who loved him. Maybe
What confuses you? It’s not like a regular book…I think it would make more sense with more parts of it up here, but there’s this street that a bunch of people are walking down and each person has their own story. Each story is a chapter. And also, they kind of notice other people on the street so their stories are all intertwined (like Daron noticing the girl with the young child) and then at the end I was thinking to say stuff like "What would have happened if Daron had stopped to talk to Abby (the girl in the red shirt)? Would he have finally found a soulmate? Would she have found the perfect father figure for her daughter?" Stuff like that….
What confuses you? It’s not like a regular book…I think it would make more sense with more parts of it up here, but there’s this street that a bunch of people are walking down and each person has their own story. Each story is a chapter. And also, they kind of notice other people on the street so their stories are all intertwined (like Daron noticing the girl with the young child) and then at the end I was thinking to say stuff like "What would have happened if Daron had stopped to talk to Abby (the girl in the red shirt)? Would he have finally found a soulmate? Would she have found the perfect father figure for her daughter?" Stuff like that….
Sorry same edit twice :-D….and that art bench idea was REALLY cool I’d love to see it…glad that I’m not THAT weird and there are some other people out there who do in fact think the same way as me (-;
whoa it’s cut off….Maybe on this very street. But probably not.
He needs a companion. And he’s tried to find one before. His boss, his coworker, even the lady who sells mangoes two streets away from his house and doesn’t speak English. But none of them wanted to be his friend. They just walked away with a smile, thinking “That Daron character is quite stranger” (or “Él se fue sin comprar un mango!”).
So he busies himself and works day in and day out and hopes for something better. Every day, he walks on this street to get to his office which is three blocks away from his house. He moved just so he could be closer to his office. Because that’s where he always is. He never goes over to his friend’s house or goes on a date with his girlfriend, because he doesn’t have either. And there will never be anyone who likes him in the world. That’s what he tells himself and that is probably his biggest obstacle. He is his own biggest obstacle.
As he keeps walking he notices the young girl

I am 29, a wife and mother of 2 girls who are 5 and 10. I had my first daughter when I was 19, so after my body pretty much went back to the way it was before, but after my second pregnancy I went from a size 5 and 115 lbs. to a size 9 and 130 lbs. It doesn’t seem like too much, but I am only 5’2" so 15 lbs. is a lot for me. My issue is that I really want to go back down to around a size 5 or so and like 115 lbs, but the truth is I’d just be happy if my stomach was not so fat. After I had my youngest daughter, I became a stay at home mom. Stay at home=lazy for me. I started eating more without even realizing it, but now it’s obvious. I have horrible "muffin top" and I just can’t stand it anymore. It’s hard to get shirts that hide my stomach rolls. OK, when I say stomach rolls, I mean I’m not a huge person, so having three fat rolls looks bad. Plus my thighs are getting larger as well.
Now that I’ve rambled on about what i look like…I need help learning or being told how to get rid of this fat. I have tried SO many things. I was doing a work out routine once a day for a few weeks and saw no results. I started doing Zumba once a week, but now I don’t have a reliable babysitter, so that’s out. I’ve tried eating better, but I get SO hungry and just give in. Supper time is bad because my husband doesn’t get home until after 8:30, so I’ll make supper for me and the kids and then be hungry again when he gets home and eat again. I’m a horrible t.v. watcher/eater. It seems I find myself going to the fridge constantly to get something to eat, and when i don’t have something I obsess about it. Like I’ll decide not to get something, go sit down, and then it’s all I think about. Also, no one else is concerned about eating healthy, and my husband is rather picky with veggies and stuff, so he’s not on board. Another problem is exercise. I have tried the once a day thing, but stuff comes up or it’s my husband’s day off and we’ll go away and i’ll just quit doing it. The only thing I’ve found that I actually like doing is walking at a local park.
I’m just so upset. I want to look good, I’m not even 30. I don’t want this to continue until I’m big and fat and hate myself. It’s just so hard I don’t know if i can do anything about it. And i hate hearing the "have will power" "get a buddy" "just find a routine you like and stick to it". I want someone to TELL me what to do. And I can’t spend any money on it either, so online plans are out.
HELP!
I said I do NOT want to spend money, so PLEASE…give me real answers, not gimmick websites.
I actually have tried spark people, the problem is, they give you a menu of things to eat, I can’t just run out and buy all of those things. Also, websites just seem very cold and impersonal.

II met this guy online. We have never seen each other before or ever pass by one another. He was only an internet guy, and he lives like 500 plus miles from me. When I first talked with him, he was going through a tough relationship with his ex whom he lived with. They separated a few months ago, and he’s back to living with his family. I was chatting with him when he was going through a tough time with his ex, and even when he’s back living with his family. When I chatted with him, he presented himself in a way that I adored, and admired him greatly. After days of chatting, we took a step further and formed a relationship together. While we were together, he told me about how shortage of money he is, and how close to being homeless he will be, for his family doesn’t want him and keep charging him for housing (Keep in mind, that I don’t know him that well, therefore, I won’t know if what he’s telling is truth or not).I did told him at the time that if he ever needs money, I could lend him. He said that he’s fine, and will let me know when he needs it. During our relationship, things weren’t going too well. The fact that we’re forming a long distance relationship contributes to the fact that I become very distrustful of him and feel like is just nothing. After days, his sweet talk turned into bitter, and I could tell that his feelings toward me are fading. I dislike it, because I don’t want to waste my time on someone who won’t acknowledge me, and only does when he’s in need of someone. The thought of his ex seems to linger in this thoughts, and I could tell because he literally stated that in his blog. Some of his writings in there seems like he kept going back to his ex, and tried to get with her again. His tactics was a complete failure, because I checked his ex’s blog, and she writing about refusing to go back to him. I realized that this has been going on, and tried to talk with him, but accomplish very little. He said that he’s over her, but seem very impossible that he is. After days of our relationship, I broke up with him because he couldn’t seem to get over his ex. I tried to distance myself away from him afterward because I know that he would try to get back with me when he’s in need of someone. I did, and rejected his phone number from my cell.
Last night, he messaged me and told me to lend him 00 because he’s homeless. He will use the money to find a place to live, and buy a car. Should I just give him the money, or ignore him since I don’t even know him that well.

I know this sounds very obvious, for the fact that I don’t know this guy, and I should just automatically say "no"..but one thing that keeps me from doing so is because I told him earlier in our relationship that I will lend him money if ever needs. Should I go against my words, make myself sounds like a liar and just say no? What should I do?

I’m sorry if there seem to be some underlying messages in this writing. I’m about to leave to school, and just rushing through this. (Oh and by the way, I’m currently in my first year in college, and the semester is coming to an end soon. Few months, then it’s the start of my second semester in college. Should I save the money for my education, instead of helping someone I don’t know? Or..should I be like those ppl who would do great things to others for they believe that great things will be return in the future?)
. Your thoughts are welcome and very much appreciated. Thank you in advance

over 2/3 of the people getting the Tax increase are small business owners, I saw an interview where the Liberal strategist said that the Republicans prefer Wall Street bankers to the ordinary citizen, when the truth is a tax increase on small businesses is just another job killer.

Why not the truth instead of more spin and demonizing the successful?